Prussia's Bird
by ilurrrverussia
Summary: PrussiaxReader. Prussia arrives at your house, asking you to go the vet's with him. Thus starts your mad journey to the vet's and back. Present for GEMfaerie. Contains: SuFin, GerIta, USUK, Harry Potter, Sebastian and Chuck Norris!


**This is dedicated to GEMfaerie who commented on my first ever Fanfiction! She's also my dear friend and I wish her well with the weird nutcase on her bus. She deserves a far better Birthday present than this! If it's really rubbish, perhaps I should make her an AmericaxReader? Anyway, this is very late, so HAPPY BIRTHDAY! **

(Note: You need to pretend you own your own house, okay? And that you live in a street with all the other Hetalia characters in it. Actually, you need a very active imagination in this story.)

You were sat in your house, doing nothing in particular. Perhaps you were sat down with a cup of tea? Coffee? Hot chocolate? Milk? It doesn't matter; you were sat down with a drink. You were watching the world outside your window. The Heavens were opening up with snow. Or dandruff, if you have that kind of sense of humour. Your snowman was guarding your house, a gun lazily taped to its stick arms (very strong, stick arms). Russia bought a hat for your snowman (a way of saying sorry for leaving his house coat over at your house) and England brought some scones (blee!) as a sorry present too for when he destroyed your door. But now your door was back into its normal state and the pigeons outside were enjoying Iggy's scones (they're not prepared for the sore throat they'll have later, YOU MONSTER!). Snow angels were littered everywhere, and don't get me started on the rude words scribbled into the fluffy blanket that covered the surrounding area. Yes, life was bliss, especially seeing as you were cuddled up into your pyjamas (courtesy of Poland). Ahhh, yes, bliss. But bliss can't stay too long if you live near a bunch of dirty, possibly-homosexual countries, can it?

"LET ZE AWESOME ME IN!"

Ahhh, yes, there goes bliss; out the window and into the road. And talking about dirty, possibly-homosexual countries, there was one right outside at that moment, destroying your spanking new door.

"OI! THE AWESOME I SAID..." You sighed and got out of your warm blanket (did I forget to mention that? OOOPS!) And lumbered your way to the door. Did you mind that Prussia was going to see you in your pyjamas? Nope. Besides, he saw you in your pyjamas a few weeks ago (LONG STORY!). Sighing, you unlocked the door.

"Hallo!" Prussia boomed as you opened it. He bounced right pass you and went into your living room, inviting himself in, naturally. Warily you followed him in. In all honesty, you were a bit too drowsy to put up with the albino. But hey, he was already inside, what could you do?

"Why are you here?" You asked, arms folded, to make sure he couldn't see anything that was worth blabbing about to France.

"I need you to come vith me." It was more of an order than an explanation. The white haired man had settled himself onto your couch. He perched himself on your pillows as if he was the Queen of Sheba.

"Why?"

"Because I said so!" Prussia huffed. He expected you to see his reasoning. He expected you to be over the moon with the joy of him gracing you with his presence. Needless to say, you weren't.

"Where?"

"The vets." Prussia shrugged, as if you went there all the time. Ja, because the vet's is totally the coolest place to hangout. Not.

"Why?" "Because I said so!" Ahhh the dreaded explanation, yet again.

"Alright, let me go and get dressed." Like a lazy cat, you rolled other and showed him your underbelly (not literally). You surrendered as quickly as Italy surrenders when he sees an angry Germany coming his way.

"Vhy? You can come just the way you are!" Prussia argued. Because going to the vet's in your pyjamas is something everyone does, da?

"No, I need to get dressed." You persisted. It was Prussia's turn to give up.

"Ja, ja, but be quick!" Prussia waved his hand dismissively at you. You stormed up the stairs, into your bedroom and got dressed. T-shirt, jeans, underwear, trainers, coat and scarf, that's what you wore. Not specifically in that order though! And socks, can't forget them! You raced down the stairs, remembering that the last time Prussia was left alone in your house he burnt your kettle. Unfortunately for you, you missed a step and landed straight on your bottom.

"Oi! No time for sitting around, we've got to go!" Prussia shouted, heaving you up by your arms.

"Do we have to go?" You yawned, "It's cold outside!"

"It was colder yesterday than it is today," Prussia pointed out. "And yet you went outside yesterday to make a snow dog!" You smiled to yourself; your snow dog was simply the best (BETTER THAN ALL THE REST!).

"Yeah but today's different."

"How?" "Because I'm tired."

"Vhy?"

Ooooh, toughie. How do you explain Russia keeping you up all night without making it sound dirty?

"Russia fixed his phone and was ringing me to test it out." You said honestly. "And then he gave me a running commentary of his day and current activities."

"Vhy?" "Because he's lonely, no one will go visit him apart from me and Belarus!"

"Serves him right," Prussia snarled, "Come on zen, let's go!"

You stepped out into the veil of snow flakes, a lovely CRUNCH underneath your trainers. Prussia raced on a head, his footprints murdering your poor snow angels. The sky was just a boring piece of A4 paper compared to the vast world underneath. You snowman stood to attention (yet again, not literally!) with his little snow dog yapping at you (not literally). And a little snow bird tweeting at you. Wait, WHAT?!

"Gilbird! How unawesome of you! If you catch the flu..." Prussia scolded his little yellow friend. Well, white; because it decided to make snow bird-angels.

"Are we not going to drive?" You blinked.

"Nein, my car wouldn't work this morning. Besides, Germany skidded in his car and went right through Italy's back garden fence." You smirked to yourself. The thought of that cute Italian screaming in his funny voice "AHHH! Germany! You banged my back garden!" was too humorous of a silly joke to resist.

You both carried on walking in silence. Gilbird snuggled up into Prussia's scarf, "borrowed" from France. Thankfully, the pavements were made of pure snow, giving you enough grip to walk on. However, Finland was ice-skating on the road, the ice a very blue complexion.

"Hey, Finland!" You waved from the side.

"Hi!" He greeted you before skiing off into the distance. You watched him a little while before wondering about what Prussia needs with a vet.

"So, Prussia, why do I have to go to the vets with you?" There was a good start.

"Because the awesome me declared so!" Prussia huffed. "Now stop asking unawesome questions or I'll invade your vital regions with my five meters!" You grinned at that. You'd like to see him try, to be honest.

"Russia has 15... And a few inches to spare!" You taunted the albino next to you.

"Oh, shut it you!" Prussia huffed, storming on ahead. He walked a few steps in front of you. After a few blissful moments of silence, he turned around to you and said: "How would you know?"

"Well, his meters aren't exactly shy!" That really got him. He growled and went back into his stroppy shell. Why were you walking when you could've went back home? Well, because you wanted to know why Prussia wanted to go to the vets.

You were nice and warm in your coat, walking in silence. Everyone else was skidding and skiving, skiing and falling over. Jack Frost nibbled at any exposed skin, shredding the spirits of those around you. Despite that, the surrounding scenery was beautiful, like in a fairy tale, or a book. Or a painting or a Christmas card. Or even a fanfiction. Snow dusted the trees like sugar on shortbread. Ahhh, yes, very splendid indeed.

Suddenly a car was honking. You paid no attention to it, until it carried on. Three conclusions: A stalker/kidnapper, France (worse!) or an argument. Neither was right, for a man stepped out of the car and ran in front of you. A man so manly he made manly men look unmanly. So darn manly that he had to be related to Chuck Norris. A manly man so manly he was manlier than Russia, Prussia, America and Britain put together. So marvellously manly that he was even manlier than China!

Yes, you guessed it.

It was Poland. "Want a lift?" Lithuania said from behind his manly man of a master.

"It's alright, I'm walking with Prussia."

"Like seriously? He's totally walking on a head of you!" The manliest man said. "Oi! Prussia! Totally walk like with my husband you totally stinky flamingo!"

You smiled. You forgot that you "married" Poland. How could you forget? It was the funniest wedding ever! Everyone was either pink or a flamingo (which are pink) and Romano was the "priest". And you had muffins for a wedding cake. And instead of a flower girl, you had a skittle girl. Poland wore fewer clothes than Rihanna and you wore more clothes than a wardrobe.

"Vhat? Husband? You're married to Poland and cheating on him vith Russia?" Prussia squawked.

"I was telling him about Russia's 15 meters." You explained to your darling wife, before he could start accusing you of adultery.

"Oh! You totally didn't know that, Prussia? He flashed it around more times than Harry Potter used his wand." Poland nodded as if he was a wise sage telling young kids how to become a ninja. You noticed that a poor Lithuanian was dabbing his nose bleed from behind your manly wife.

"Car, anyone?" Lithuania gasped as he pointed towards a pink car with the hand that wasn't dabbing his nose. Daringly you stared at Prussia. He nodded. Everyone climbed into the pink car, after a long argument of who was going in front (You vs. Prussia vs. Lithuania) then who was driving (Poland vs. Prussia vs. Lithuania).

"Where are you heading?" Lithuania asked everyone in the back.

"The vet's."

"Wow, totally? We're going there like too!" Poland shouted from the front. As you can see, Poland won the right to drive his florescent pink car and Lithuania won the right to be in the front.

"For your pony?" Prussia asked as he patted Pony's back. Pony was sat in between your and Prussia.

"YEAH! What about you, why are you going?" Poland shouted whilst beeping at the driver in front. Only a manly man can multi-task! From the mirror, you could see Lithuania go red with shame, probably from being in a pink car that was honking at everyone.

"For Gilbird." Prussia said affectionately as his little bird poked its head outside the scarf. A little tweet was heard and Gilbird snuggled up to his master's neck. Ahhh, so that's what he was going for! A bit obvious really since the vet's isn't the most practical place to hangout.

Anyway, you got to the vet's eventually. The Seven Seas Vet's to be precise. It was a large building with cream walls and coffee features. It looked serene, almost like the Eden of the modern world. Vines of pink roses eagerly climbed up the walls and the fences, daisies springing up on the cobble stone path leading to the door. It's a good thing it had a banister on your way in; Poland clutched it for his life when his knees went on the icy path. Lithuania grabbed the pony for balance. You grabbed Poland's waist, Prussia then grabbing your waist in turn. All three of you made an odd shuffle to the door.

Inside the vets sat the most epic person ever. More epic than Prussia. And Tamaki. And Negi. And Sebastian. And the nine-tailed fox from Naruto. Yes, it was CHUCK NORRIS!

"How may you kids help me today?" He asked, sat lazily on a counter. Poland died of a very manly fangasm.

"We're here for my awesome bird." Prussia said humbly (that is one in a life time moment!).

"Your bird seems A-OK to me." Mr Norris nodded to you. Yes, you. At first you were over-joyed because MR NORRIS CALLED YOU A-OK! And then you remembered you were a human being, not a bird.

"She isn't my-" "She is, son, you'll see!" He nodded sagely, and pointed towards another coffee-coloured door. So you left the red and green room with Chuck Norris in it and proceeded without Pony, Lithuania and Poland. You were confused, to say the least. You started on a crazy adventure to the vets, met your wife, went to the vets and saw Chuck Norris and then got called a bird. Prussia's bird to be exact. Prussia is a total hotty but his bird? Did you look like you two were together? Was it because Chuck didn't see Gilbird?

The waiting room for the vets was mad. So mad you forgot about your worries over the "bird thing" and concentrated on knowing where to sit (like Rebecca Black). Prussia grabbed a seat next to Germany, leaving you to in-between him and Russia. Why was the waiting room mad? Well, it was a small corridor. Your legs were touching not only Prussia's but Russia's and Sweden's as well (three hotties in one!). Your shoulders had very little room to move. Any spare space was being used by animals. The walls were pure white, like in a mental confinement, and the carpet was blue (you think). The animals were squawking, barking, purring, tweeting and hissing away, noise mixing into a blur of interference.

"Privyet!" Russia greeted you happily. You greeted him back, feeling Prussia's glare at the back of your head. _Darn, of course!_ You remembered. Russia and the 15 meters argument this morning with Prussia!

"Russia, how big is your banana?" _As if Prussia asked that!_ You groaned to yourself.

"We don't grow bananas in Russia." Russia smiled innocently. _Darn that stupid Prussian!_

"Oh so it's like that, hmm?" Prussia nodded harshly, "You grow trees instead?"

"Da! We have a lot of trees... and mountains." Prussia's scarlet eyes went as wide as tea cups. You smiled and sighed to yourself; trust Prussia to take it the wrong way "Why? Do you want to see them?" Russia asked hopeful. Bless, he wanted Prussia to come and visit him.

"NEIN!" Prussia shouted, horrified. He abruptly turned his head to his brother, who had no idea about their little conversation.

"So why are you here?" You asked the tallest nation, deciding that it was the best way to make conversation.

"For my cats!" He said proudly. Your eyes glimpsed at his lap. A fluffy, brown, fat cat sat on his master's lap contently; both owner and cat had the same nose. And the same happy smiley face. Your eyes then glimpsed downwards towards his legs, where a girl with dark chocolate hair sat. She was dressed a cat, with the ears and the tail. "What's your name then?" You were baffled at the girl. Hopefully if she had a normal name, you could ring the police to report a kidnapping.

"Ilurrrverussia!" She purred, rubbing her head on Russia's legs. Ilurrrverussia? What kind of name was that?

"You do realise you're a human, right?" You questioned the cat-girl further. Ilurrrverussia was not happy about this!

"You shush! Me a cat meow! Russia me owner, meow, I lurrrve him!" She half babbled, half wept. Unfortunately for you, you didn't realise she was going to write a PrussiaXReader later and make you look bad! (MWAHAHAHA! MEOW!)

Tip toe-ing pass everyone; Lithuania took a seat next to Sweden, parking Pony and Poland's dead carcass next to him. Hanatamago was playing with Blackie (one of Germany's dogs) whilst Pony was being glared at by a koala (no doubt Australia's). America's rabbit and England's hare/rabbit thing were mating (uh-oh, like their owners) whilst birds were flying up in the air.

"You here for Hanatamago?" You asked politely to Sweden, who was looking up at the ceilings. He nodded.

"She pr'f'rs t' b' c'll'd Charlotte." Sweden replied, not looking down. (English with vowels: She prefers to be called Charlotte).

"I saw Finland skiing his way here." You tried again. Sweden smiled (OH MY GOODNESS) and nodded.

"M' w'fe." He sighed happily to himself. Oh my gosh, you thought, did that just happen? Even that cat-girl was staring at him.

After five minutes of staring at a non-moving and non-talking Sweden, you gave up on making conversation with Sweden and turned your head towards Prussia and Germany.

"You here for your dogs?" You asked sweetly. The blonde German nodded and smiled at his furry companions.

"And my cat." He said, pointing towards a dark grey cat on his lap.

"We vere discussing about zhe crampness." Prussia explained to you. "West says zat zhere is much more room at zhe end, but zhat idiot took up such space." It didn't take very long for you to figure out which idiot.

"America isn't that fat." You stuck up for your friend. He was your skittle girl at your wedding and made a fabulous flamingo!

"No, he brought a cat with him." Russia joined into your conversation, bored of staring at a shaking Lithuania. "And a rabbit." Lithuania nipped in, now with the rabbit snuggled on his own lap. "And a whale." Germany said blankly. You laughed. Trust America to do that! His whale, oh goodness!

Being in the vets was warm, at least. And you had hilarious company. And who doesn't want to be sat in a room full of Hetalian hotties? A hot Prussian to your right, a cute Russian to your left, a very sexy Swede opposite you.

"So what breed is your cat?" You asked Russia, looking down at the weird cat-girl.

"Engatholic!" Russia nodded. "I bought it in England for 2p! Isn't she adorable?" Then the Russian stroked the girl's hair, whispering to her. She purred and lifted her head for more.

A few minutes went by and you stared at the Engatholic cat. England must have some really weird cats! Germany reckoned that England sold Russia the girl dressed as a cat and got the name from English Catholic. Prussia reckoned that Russia stole her on Halloween, mistaking her for a real cat, and the girl played a long with it so she didn't get killed. You reckoned that the girl was mad in the head.

"Hello everyone." A teenage boy came through the door, talking to the room. "Please, try to keep your pets near you, preferably on your laps. Failing to do so, I shall have to spank you with my wand." The boy had a British accent. Glasses, scar, dark hair. Yes, it's pretty obvious "Konnichiwa Harry-kun." Japan nodded towards the adolescent. Was Japan hiding behind Russia the whole time? "Konnichiwa, Japan-san." Harry greeted Japan and then walked over with as much importance as he could muster. He then stroked the cat-girl's head and high-fived Britain as he went pass.

"You heard the boy!" America boomed out, right at the end. "ON LAPS!"

Russia moved his Russicat on to your lap and then sat his Engatholic cat on to his. Sweden moved his doggy onto his lap. Germany balanced his two dogs on his lap, passed Blackie over to Gilbert and sat Germouser (his cat) onto Italy. Italy sat Gino (that's Itabby) on top of his head. Gilbird sat himself on his master's white hair. Lithuania, being the mad genius he is, made Pony stand next to his seat. He then (with the help from America) flunked your wife onto Pony's back, leaving him to dangle pathetically. Suddenly the room seemed less noisy as owners moved their pets onto their bodies. But there still was no room for leg "So, Lithuania, what did Mr Norris say when you were in there?" Italy asked, popping his head outside of Germany's shoulder.

"He said that Poland had a very nice unicorn." Lithuania said, patting Pony's head. You were just about to argue that his pony was not a unicorn, until a magical horn spurted out of Pony's head! Why was no one else shocked but you?

A few minutes of silence hung around for a while. Until, of course, the possibly-homosexual countries decided to entertain themselves once again.

"I'm just a British dirt-bag, baby!" "Big brother France, that's not how it goes!" Italy giggled naïvely at France.

"Si!" Spain jumped up near the other end, with his bull at his side. "It goes like this..." Clearing his throat, he sang: "I'm just a German dirt bag baby!"

Germany stood up, sending his dogs flying, outraged. "Don't ruin McFly. I like their songs." He growled.

"Seriously?" Britain asked fluffy eyebrows at the top of his head.

"Ja, I'm a total fanboy. I kiss their faces on my posters each night." The blond replied, voice dripping and oozing with sarcasm.

"Ve! Seriously?" Italy squealed.

"Nein! You know I don't, you're vith me every night!" Germany said crossly, folding his arms. It was only until his dogs pounced up on to his lap again did Germany realise why everyone was gawping at him. "It's not how it sounds!"

Suddenly a scream was heard from Lithuania.

"R-Russia, sto-stop to-touching m-me!" Lithuania shrilled. Russia chuckled.

"I'm not touching you." "Your legs are..." Lithuania blushed. Russia's leg was sliding up and down Lithuania's. Gosh, today was a flipping yaoi day!

"How about you, Italy? What did Chuck say to you?" Japan asked, stroking his black and white cat, everyone forgetting about Lithuania's harassment and Germany's embarrassment.

"He said that Germany and I were going to have fun tonight!" Italy giggled happily. Germany stopped stroking his dogs. Prussia stopped stroking Gilbird. The whole room stopped into a silence. An eerie mood that lingered for too long.

"Isn't this supposed to be a T fanfiction?" Russia asked no one in particular, breaking the moment.

"There goes the fourth wall!" ilurrrverussia pointed over to the wall behind Sweden's head.

"It went when Harry Potter came!" Britain exclaimed.

"Huh?" Poland groaned, his head beginning to move. His emerald eyes fixed on you as he said: "My husband?"

"I th'nk you're confused, she's a g'rl." Sweden said, looking down at him. Ironic, really, if you think about him and h's w'fe.

That was it. It was too much for you. The room had turned mad again, but this time with the owners. Abruptly you stood up before you could hear anymore nonsense. Thankfully, Greece came out of the vets, followed out by his army of cats,

"PRUSSIA! YOUR TURN!" Greece shouted above the mewing of his cats. Well, you think it was Greece, since you couldn't see him for the mass of cats escaping.

"Sebastian? I thought you worked for Ciel?" Yes, that was the first thing that was said in the vet's room. It wasn't like the corridor; it didn't have neutral colours. It wasn't like Chuck Norris' office; it wasn't an explosion of the rainbow. It wasn't like your ordinary vet room; it wasn't white with pictures of clients or health posters. The only poster up was: "Love your kitty!" The room was ebony and a dark, blood-thirsty scarlet. Pictures of Ciel and others conquered the walls. And pictures of cats. A very pale man stood in the room, with hair to match the ink walls and eyes that matched the scarlet furniture.

"I do, but I couldn't resist the temptation to work here." He smiled a very sly smile. Prussia backed away slowly, sensing the demon's danger. You could feel it too, but you kind of wanted to glomp him. Seconds of uneasiness passed at a snail's pace, until the slender man spoke again. "Did you bring a cat?"

"Nein, my bird."

"She looks fine to me." ACK! SEBASTIAN JUST CALLED YOU FINE! Wait, bird?

"I'm not his bird." You sighed, folding your arms.

"I wanted you to bring me a cat," Sebastian pouted at Prussia, leaning on a wall. "Like that cute Engatholic out there." _Why did everyone think she was a cat? _You pondered. (Ha-ha! Sebastian called me cute!)

"I vanted you to check up on Gilbird." Prussia argued back. Right on time, Gilbird flew out from Prussia's head and settled down on his table.

Sebastian didn't reply to Prussia and turned all his attention on Gilbird. He gently lifted his talons and checked them. He did likewise with his yellow feathers, and opened up his beak.

"Why did you take him to the vet's?" Sebastian asked Prussia, long slender fingers still opening Gilbird's mouth.

"His tweets haven't been the same." Prussia explained. "They're sounding less awesome." (I bet someone just started thinking about Twitter.)

Sebastian nodded slowly, too slowly. Far too slow for your liking. It was like on one of those really soppy movies when the protagonist finds out that their lover is going to die of an incurable illness. A slow, romantic and painful death. And when the doctor breaks this to the protagonist, they often nod slowly and talk deeply. Here come the deep words...

"Did he eat any scones?" "Vhat?"  
"Did he eat any scones?" Sebastian repeated again, looking further into Gilbird's beak. A serious voice for such a stupid question. And there were you, worried for nothing!

"Nein! I'd never make him scones!" The albino defended himself against the accusations.

"Please, sir, I work in Britain for my master. He's British. He often eats scones. If he buys the cheap kind in desperation, which are often either burnt or badly prepared, then he will get a sore throat from the scone being lodged in his throat. This is what's wrong with your little male birdie." "Are you sure it's a scone?" You asked. Birds do eat bread so that could be it too, right?

"Yes, I can see the pastry and the raisins. If I didn't know then what kind of vet would I be?"

"Vhat vill happen? Can you fix it doctor?" The Prussian pleaded with the red-eyed vet. Now it was like one of those cheesy hospital dramas.

"Of course I will have to do surgery on him."

"Oh, doctor! Be gentle!" Now you were worried. The way Prussia just said that, you didn't like that at all. It was as if you were going to see a SebastianxPrussia moment!

Sebastian nodded slowly and opened the golden bird's beak once more. One of his long slender fingers slid down Gilbird's throat, much to the dismay of Prussia. The visible lump in the bird's throat disappeared as the scone sank into Gilbird's belly. This must've been Sebby's version of an operation. Gilbird tweeted happily, Prussia gasping as he did so.

"YOU'RE AWESOME! DANKE!" Prussia shouted from the bottom of his heart. And the top of his lungs.

"Now, about the price." Sebastian said casually as Gilbird flew back to his master. "I require one guinea."

"AHA! I got pet insurance!" Prussia shouted triumphantly, taking your hand in his. He then wondered near the door. "So put that in your pipe and blow it!" And with that, the two of you ran off.

The two of you ran out of the vet's room and into the waiting room. You wondered why Prussia was seen before all the others, when they were all waiting longer. You noticed Prussia whispering something to his West and then turning to you.

"Come on then, let's get you home." Prussia said, grabbing your hand once again and exiting the mad room. You had two thoughts: Should I squeal or act cool? C'mon, Prussia's a total hotty. Even I, the RUSSIA-IS-SO-FREAKING-CUTE cat-girl, have to admit he's a total hotty. Silver hair, red eyes, 5 meters, nice teeth, looks like Jack Frost from Rising of the Guardians. Sure he can be annoying, but he's awesome. AND HE WAS HOLDING YOUR HAND!

"Bye, babe. Bye bird." Chuck Norris nodded coolly as he sat on his counter. You waved and smiled whilst Prussia just grinned.

"Bye Chucky-baby!" Prussia teased back, blowing him a kiss. Chuck caught the kiss in his hand and then, with the same hand, whacked you on the back of your head. You frowned at him and then giggled. Prussia continued to lead you out of the Vet's and into the broad sunlight outside. "It's slippy, don't be clumsy!" Prussia instructed as he clung on to the banisters. Delicately, you tiptoed behind him, your hands cold from the banisters. Until you remembered something.

"Wait, I didn't say goodbye to my wife!"

"Who?"

"Poland! We should wait for him!"

"Nein, it's cold and I want to get in before West," Prussia shook his head. "I want to set up monopoly before he can get in." "Why?"

"Because he unawesomely ruins it! He always cheats and gives himself more money! Zhat's why he always wins!" You smirked. Germany didn't seem like the type to cheat but he did seem the type to beat people at games. Especially when it included money. But then again, that can't be as bad as playing Monopoly with Switzerland.

"... Will you play it vith me sometime?" You looked up at him. He looked down at you. His face looked serious... and adorable. Slowly you nodded, half expecting him to start teasing you.

"Sure, I'll play."

Prussia nodded. Noticing how cold your hands were, you helped yourself out of the Seven Seas Vets cobblestone path and started the journey home. You couldn't help but remember what Sebastian was saying about Gilbird and scones. Was it coincidence that he was in your front garden when you had Iggy's scones out for the birds?

You were half way between your house and the vet's before you talked to Prussia. He was being oddly quiet. You were quite warm, not just because of your coat, but because the temperature had went up. The snow was beginning to turn into ice, which made progress on your journey agonisingly slow.

"H-Hey, Prussia?"

"I prefer being called 'Your Awesomeness',"

"Your Awesomeness?"

"Ja, ugly?"

"Well," You contemplated. Should you tell him? If he gets upset, you could run the distance to your house (and land on your bottom!). But he could stop speaking to you all together. So, you were screwed.

"You saying something or not?" "I'm sorry about Gilbird."

"Vhy? It vasn't your fault!"

Hahaha, now you were definitely screwed. You continued walking, not knowing what to do. In your head, an angel Italy was shouting "Ve! Honesty is the best policy!" whilst France... being France, was shouting "DON'T! NON!"

"Well, it could've been..."

"Vhat? How?"

"I threw out some scones on my front garden..." You explained, looking down at your trainers, "...this morning: the birds were eating them. They were made by England." You looked up at Prussia. You expected to be slapped across the face. Or to see him burst into tears and run away (nah, that's more Italy). You expected to see him angry, or with his mouth agape in shock. But when you looked up, you didn't see anything that was expected. You saw the unexpected.

A smile.

"Silly girl!" Prussia laughed, "Gilbird had a sore throat since yesterday afternoon. He was playing outside, being awesome, whilst pecking at America!"

Gently he patted your head and laughed. You laughed with him, relieved. Normally you were the one with more common sense!

"So he must've got one of England's scones off America."

"Ja. Aren't I awesome?"

"Yeah, I guess you are." You smirked, poking him in the arm. He poked you back. Thus soon you two were poking and giggling at each other. And insulting one another. You forgot the serene scenery around you, you forgot all about the vet's and Gilbird. All that mattered was the two of you and your poke/insult war. And, to be frank, you were very happy with it.

"You can't talk about England's cooking! Your cooking is just as bad!"

You faked a gasp, slapping your cheek in mock surprise.

"You've never tasted my food."

"Ja, I did! At Switzy's sleep over. You and Greece made me some kebabs to sober me up."

"No, you were so drunk that you thought it was kebabs. It was Italy's pizza."

"Vhatever. You owe me a kebab."

"Just like you owe me a malteaser."

Suddenly you both stopped in your tracks. You turned to look at him, bewildered, your eyes questioning why you stopped. Prussia returned your glance, a soft gaze in his red eyes. And a soft smile on his hotty face.

"Sebby and Chucky vere right," He said softly, "You are my bird." The gaze of bewilderment wondered back onto your face. Did he just say that? Was he complimenting you? Was he hinting something? Oh my goodness, should you tell Poland? He'd love listening to this!

"Ja, you're my brain-dead funky chicken." And that's when you reached sideways to slap the cheeky Prussian across the face. Except the "reached" turned into a lurched. Your body didn't keep its balance as your feet lost their footing on the ice. Suddenly the world you knew grew further away as you sunk. You immediate reaction was to hold out your arms and to close your eyes, a defensive stance. However, your arms went right through the collisional object as your head landed on something somewhat soft. And comfy. Like a Russian, but not as comfy. Damn, you thought, I know what I've done now!

You opened your eyes and looked upwards. You saw what you expected. Prussia grinning at you.

"I know you can't keep your hands off me!" Prussia teased as you notice that your arms had wrapped themselves around his neck. "But do it vith more self-respect!" You blushed; angry, frustrated, embarrassed at the stupid situation. You looked away, noticing a little cat walking past.

Suddenly there was a little touch on your cheek. It was very gentle and soft, almost like a butterfly landing on someone's nose. You thought you imagined it, until you turned round to see a confused Prussian.

"Did that just happen?"

"What?"

"Did you not feel that?"

"What?"

"I kissed your cheek and you felt nothing?" Prussia looked at you as if you just told him you were secretly Chuck Norris.

"You kissed my cheek?" You stared at him now, not believing a word. OMD! HE KISSED YOU! How can you doubt Chuck Norris' wisdom?

"... Ja... Anyvay!" Prussia chatted brightly onwards. "I'd like to be a bird. Tweet! Tweet!"

Hah, that wasn't fooling you.

"I'm your favourite type of bird though, aren't I?" You teased meanly. He stuck his tongue out at you.

"My favourite types are GILBIRD 'because he's AWESOME! And penguins, 'cause they waddle." He then waddled on the ice, looking completely loony. Off his head. You laughed at the idiot and carried on walking but you were still cautious of the ice.

"You also like chickens. "Nein." "You do!"

"I don't! **I LIKE PENGUINS!**" The albino jumped and landed on his stomach. He then belly-slid down the path, like a penguin would. Then he landed head first into a lamp-post!

"Gilbert? You alright?" You half asked with worry, half giggled with laughter. He moved painfully slowly, grunting as he did so. He looked up at you. And on his face sat a big, fat grin.

"ZHAT VAS AWESOME! DO IT AGAIN!" Prussia grinned despite blood gushing out of his nose like a water fountain.

Once Prussia's nose stopped bleeding, the two of you set off again. You could see your house now in plain sight. You thought about your crazy day: going to the vet's to find Chuck Norris and Sebastian; sitting in the waiting room with dirty, homosexual countries; walking home and getting kissed by Prussia. Seriously, this was one whacked up day. But it was kind of cool, wasn't it? (THE ENGATHOLIC CAT SAYS YES.)

"Birds can fly away with no problem. Free to go wherever they please." Prussia reflected to himself out loud, enjoying the blissful silence between the two of you. "Not unless they're caged. Then they're trapped."

"Ja. Und they get eaten."

"You still want to be a bird?"

"Ja," Prussia sighed dreamily, "Penguins never get eaten."

You didn't want to tell him that penguins could die out. You didn't want to tell him that penguins were still kept in zoos. You didn't want to tell him that penguins can't fly. You didn't want to tell him, so you didn't. You both carried on walking, making your way to your snowman. He was melting now, so his eyes kind of ran down the side of his face. Kind of like a Picasso painting. An odd sensation conquered your chest. The feeling you sometimes get when you watch the end of a brilliant series or when you read the final page of a brilliant book. That feeling of weird melancholy. And you had it right now, with your snowman (and snow dog). The sense of something good ending. Perhaps you had this feeling because you've reached your house?

"I guess this is good bye." You sighed, stood directly in front of your snowman. He was a good snowman, with his orange nose and button-eyes.

"He'll reincarnate next year!" Prussia poked your shoulder. "Don't worry about it!"

"He won't be the same next year. He'll be someone completely different." You frowned, watching your snowman die an agonisingly slow death. Prussia wrapped an arm around your shoulder, making you feel even warmer.

"I'll tell you vhat, you ring Russia's new phone later and get him to ring Switzy. Switzy will ring Specs and Specs will ring me. Then me and Switzy and Luddy will come over and store him in a freezer. Then he'll be immortal. How about that?" "Where will you get the freezer from?" "Steal it from Specs."

You were touched, to say the least. Prussia was willing to make exceptions for you. Even steal a freezer to help your snowman. Awwww!

"Danke, Gilbert."

"Velcome, Funky-Chicken."

Once you stopped reminiscing about Mr Snowman and Snow dog, Prussia lead you to your front door. The weird sensation in your heart was still there but it was soon being over-powered by the sensation of bliss. Prussia's done so much for you today. First he dragged you to the vet's and then on the way back he kissed your cheek and offered to immortalise your snowman. Talk about a weird day!

"Bye, Prussia." You said, standing in your doorway. Prussia stood on your doorstep, smiling. "Bye!" The feeling of weird-endness was intensifying now. Prussia began to walk off, his footprints melting more of the ice now. You watched him go as far as you snow dog before you turned around to go inside. But something stopped as you turned around to face your door. Footprints were heard coming towards you. Then two arms snaked around your waist, a warm breathe tickling the side of your face. You shivered.

"My penguin." Gilbert's voice whispered. He lips placed a kiss on your cheek. After that, the albino's arms removed themselves from your waist and footsteps were heard running away. You turned around to see the Prussian's silhouette run off into the distance. You grinned. Sure that feeling of weird-endness was still in your heart, but your brain figured that it was the start of a new beginning. You stood on your doorway, watching the silhouette disappear further into the distance. You smiled more to yourself.

The sky was an orange-yellow mixture of a colour, icicles dripping from the trees. Ice covered itself across the ground, sending innocent passer-bys on their bottoms. Jack Frost had retired for the evening, letting the sun erase his doings. And as you were reminiscing about the beauty of it all, your eyes settled on a couple. A couple walking pass your house. On the right was a blond male, with a cute expression on his face. He was walking a white fluffy dog and holding a pair of ice-skates in one hand, whilst holding his lover's hand in another. He lover was considerably taller, with blue eyes that were still frosty despite the sun. A smile was lit up on his face, his fingers rubbing his lover's hand. You watched the two walk pass in harmony.

"Just another day living near possibly-homosexual countries." You giggled. "Actually, scratch that, they're most definitely homosexual."

**_The End_**

**This is so late it's terrifying. I take back what I said about making more CharacterxReaders; I think this should be my last. Anyway, I hope you all have a lovely day. Oh, and by the way, scones don't give you a bad throat. Well, not any that I've ever tasted. P.S. Please tell me title names! This title name is a bit poo.**


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